Lesson-Gem Two:A Brief History/Leccion-Joya Dos: Una Breve Historia

Why is it the "Romance" language?.....Is there any romance in it?......
The term "Romance" comes from the “Vulgar Latin” (no it’s not a potty mouth Latina/o); rather it was the "nonstandard" form of the Latin language. Who knew?
I suppose one can make the connection (with Vulgar Latin); as something like, not the "formal" part of speech.

The other side to “Vulgar Latin” was Medieval Latin. So if one spoke in "Medieval Latin"; one was speaking" the conservative version" of the language. This “conservative” was used (for the most part) when writing and in formal contexts.

Keep in mind that in medieval literature of Western Europe; serious writing was usually done in Latin. However popular stories were written in the vernacular (mother tongue) and came to be called.....Yup you guessed it……….. "romances".

A side note: When my grandfather, Carlos Jose, studied law (looooooooooooong ago),my mama tells me that he did so in Latin.....So get this........He had to learn Latin (formal) first; before he could even study law!!!.......Ya know becuz law is so easy anyway........



I always hear people say that once you know Spanish (because it is a romance language); that you can pick other languages (or guys or chicks okay WAKE UP);from the same vain........Well?......

Look.........

The sentence- She always closes the window before dining (or having dinner)is written here in several romance languages. But I can only figure the sentence out in a couple of these. How about you?

Here it is in Spanish: Ella siempre cierra la ventana antes de cenar

Latin Claudit semper fenestram antequam cenat.
Aragonese Ella tranca/zarra siempre la finestra antes de zenar.
Asturian Ella pieslla siempre la ventana/feniestra primeru de cenar.
Bolognese (Lî) la sèra sänper la fnèstra prémma ed dsnèr.
Corsican Ella chjudi sempre u purtellu primma di cenà.
Catalan (Ella) sempre tanca la finestra abans de sopar.
French Elle ferme toujours la fenêtre avant de dîner/souper.
Galician (Ela) Pecha sempre a fiestra/xanela antes de cear.
Italian (Lei) chiude sempre la finestra prima di cenare
Milanese (Le) la sara semper sü la finestra prima de disnà.
Neapolitan Essa nzerra sempe 'a fenesta primma 'e magnà
Portuguese (Ela) sempre fecha a janela antes de jantar/cear.

The word "ventana" in Spanish (window) seems to appear in almost all these sentences as some form of "finestra".

Interstingly enough (for me anyway WAKE UP) I was able to "decipher" some of the words in these sentences. It would have been a lot easier for me if that darned "finestra", would have been replaced by the word "ventana", a word I know……I guess?.......

However I would have only understood pieces of information not the whole "Hallaca". What is an "Hallaca?" Glad you asked. Here it goes...

The Hallaca is a staple of the Venezuelan Holiday dinner dish. Yes my family is from Venezuela. And Hallacas are really yummy! And really only prepared for/around Christmas. They are a ton of work! So no I don't make them; so don't ask me for any orders........

The Hallaca is also the most representative icons of Venezuelan multicultural heritage. I like to think of it as Jazz....A little of this a little of that......

Hallacas are prepared with a "multicultural" array of ingredients that include: European ingredients:like raisins, nuts and olives, indigenous ingredients: corn meal colored with annatto seeds (natural plant extract used to dye foods) and onions. Also African ingredients: smoked plantain leaves used for wrapping. I love how the Hallacas look wrapped in the big plantain leaves!

Remember how I said food brings people together?..........

Okay so back to the "whole Hallaca" metaphor. When you learn Spanish in school (as a foreign language) you tend to feel as I do when I read all of these "romantic sentences".........Like" "I guess I know what there saying?"......"I can pick up some of it"........"I got one word"........hmmmmmmmmm? Kinda....Nope........

You can't "pick up" words here an there when your listening/having a conversation.......Ya know watta I mean?..........Like in Austurian the phrase : Ella pieslla siempre la ventana/feniestra primeru de cenar. If I read this or if someone was saying this to me I would get that: “She always window before dinner”......hmmmmmmm? What the heck does she do at the window before dinner? Does she jump out the window before dinner? Does she have a phobia about windows? Is her significant other coming from the window to shoot us both?.......See? It gets to be important to know.

Yes I can ask the person what she/he means; but I am not sure that I would get anywhere or where to start? Weeeeeell you might say; “You can use hand gestures and keep talking ;till one of you gives up and has dinner by themselves or with the window closed.....

To that I would say to you my dear amigos: “Would it not be better to know the entire conversation from the beginning?......

So this is what I want you to take away from this "lesson-gem" today: Don't settle. If you are taking a course on line or at a college.......Do not settle for this. Knowing half of what someone is telling you is like riding a bike with blindfolds on......Ya may get there eventually but you will be severely injured........How so?........

Tell ya next time........

Lesson-Gem One (Lección-Joya Uno)

La primera Lección-Joya tiene que ver con el alfabeto Español. Si puedes aprenderte no solo el alfabeto pero la pronunciación de cada letra; podrás empezar a leer en Español!

Obviamente no vas a saber que carrizo estas leyendo;pero al menos los que te escuchan lo creerán!

Cool huh? ja, ja, ja. That's right even the ha ha ha's have to be translated!

Proverbio de hoy:
"En boca cerrada no entran moscas!


Translation puhleeeze!!!!

The first "Lesson-Gem" has to do with the Spanish alphabet. If one can learn not only the letters in the alphabet but also how to pronounce each letter; you can start reading in Spanish. Obviously you are not going to know what the heck your reading; but others will think you do! Cool huh?

Today's proverb:
"In a closed mouth; flies can not enter" (It's funnier in Spanish)

Got Spanish?

Hola/Hello Everyone!!!!!!

So I have been busy today trying to find some other things my readers may be interested in.

So I did some digging, (not outside though too cold),but in the vast tunnels of my mind.........What did I find?....Glad you asked.......

Well besides some much needed cleaning and more than few cobwebs; I realized that I needed to add more about one of my "mother" tongues....One of them being: Spanish...Duh!......Yes another "Duh" moment for me......

By the way. Why do they do the call it "your mother tongue"?...Does there seem to be a mother in law joke in there to you?.....Okay, okay...... focus people!!!!!

So here is my plan........

Yes!!!! I will bore you with Spanish lessons, culture, about my life over seas, my family, food and so much moooooooore.......More Latina info. than you EVER dreamed of!!!!!!!!

So as you read these "lesson-gems" email me with questions/dilemmas at:
gotspanish@gmail.com

There I will be able to give you more tips (tailored to your situation); and these tips will become a part of my Blog. I will also be able to provide you with the tools you will need the most to learn Spanish. Most importantly I will learn about my readers!

So staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay tuned!!!!!!Wake up!

An Aha! Moment!

Okay I hate to use this term: "Aha moment". It sounds very commercialized/dorky to me."No se que?".......

In any event I had one of those moments this evening. By the way what is an "Aha! Moment?" It seems to me an aha! moment does not necessarily mean something good. I mean I guess that is what it's supposed symbolize?... "Aha! I found my slippers!", "Aha! I remember where I left my keys!" or "Aha! You cheating bastard I gotcha now!!!!"........See watta I mean?.........

Any who. I was talking to my husband (yes on occasion men and women can converse and these conversations don't often involve the t.v. remote).....More on this another time.....

So ya know how when someone tells you something that makes you think?.... "Well yeah!" "Duh!".......This is what happen to me tonight. I can admit it, I am a strong Latina. So here goes that story......

I was writing a new column and asked my husband (as he is my spelling Guru), how to spell something. Now, yes, I know what you are thinking. "Duh, use the spell check". Well hold on there!......... I did use the spell check only to find that their were like 15 different ways to spell this word. And, NO! I will not tell you the word I could not spell, for the life of me! It's too embarrassing.

Anyway as I was saying, before I so rudely interrupted myself: I asked my Guru hubby.

My Guru says to me (after answering my questions), "So like you speak Spanish right?".......Uhmmmmmmmmmm? "Yeah hon". "All my life". So he says, "Well I was thinking how come you don't translate your Blog into Spanish?", he continues, "I mean the whole "thing" is based on the fact that you are a Latina and can speak two languages right?"....."Uuuuuuum? Yeah hon". He says, "Weeeeeeeeell?........This would be a great way for Latinos and "those who speak Spanish" to read it as well!"

Hmmmmmmmmmm? Let's recap: "This would be a good way for Latinos AND "those" who speak "Spanish" to read it too"..........I am sorry, "honk", I need a judges ruling on this..... "Latinos and "those" who speak Spanish? Ya see how these pearls just fall on my lap? Watta am I to do? I can't not take a shot!

So in my Guru's world there are "Latinos" and "those" who speak Spanish? I think I need to re address/down grade him from that whole "Guru" thing......Definitely.......

Anyway back to my story........"BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!", I thought. "Why the hell did I not think of that?".....Duh!!!!!!!!!! (So this really became a "DUH" moment; not an aha! one). But that's how I am. That's how I roll people!

What is that saying? About being too close to the trees or the forest or something outside???? "If you get too close to a bush you can get a rash? I don't know......But it's true!!!!! If you are too close to nature you can't see a damn thing!!!....At lest that's what I think politicians say when they are hunting?.....I will leave that one to your imagination........

Speaking of nature. I had a friend who would go on vacation to her cabin. Now I must explain here before you get visions; of some gorgeous retreat in the mountains a la Hollywood style. This was not a "retreat" as in: "Oh I have to go there." This was maybe "retreat" as in: "I can't believe I came here deliberately?" Kinda thing. Okay?

One of the "special" things that her cabin lacked (of many); was that it had no running water or indoor plumbing. That's right people; this is living! Now follow me here it may get tricky........Since it had no "indoor" plumbing......Wait for it.... Yup......She had to use the out door plumbing "facilities". Yaah! She had to pee outside! I KNOW!!......

So I was like, "How the hell do you do that?", "I mean what if a thing goes up your butt or what ever?" She would laugh and answer me in a very calm instructional-tape-like- voice, "I am just too close to nature to see anything; all I feel is calmness all around me". To which I said, "Well yeah I can be calm too; but I can still feel when something bites my ass?"..........I digress.....

So anyway......... I will be translating my column (to the best of my ability) into to the Spanish language. Now I use the term "to the best of my ability" very "deliberately" here, as well as a "disclaimer"....... Don't like, count on the fact that the translating you see/read is correct. Ya know?....... Ask around....... Send me comments....... Correct me....... Whatever........ But by no means assume that I am a "translating queen".

Remember when you assume?.......You make an ass out of you and Uma Thurman.............

My first Blog.........What dare I say?.......

I should have written this a while back........But here goes....

Well I did it! I made a Blog; so now what?..hmmm?.....So much to say....so much to talk about......So much to think about. I just watched an interesting episode in what we call " television-media". I will share my take on it with you. And maybe make ya laugh! ...................

I was watching a show tonight that showed an overweight actress talking about her weight gain, loss, gain. I think this too, is the story of my life and the lives of so many; with a tiny difference.......Were not in Hollywood.

We, my friends/amigos, are not part of the beautiful Hollywood people.

A side note here: My mom thinks that all of "us" I(you/me) are the real beautiful people. Mom says that if we think about it; they (Hollywood) are the really ugly people!? Her reasoning: “Hollywood people have 5 different “assistants” getting them “ready” in the morning”. Mom goes on: “One has to be pretty damn ugly; not to look good after that!” I like this analysis.

Let's continue the show.

The woman in this show seemed to think that she had found the "key" to weight loss. Yes folks she had found the key; but she was not divulging where it was? This seemed hilarious to me; as she claimed to be out there to "help" people???
Oh this too easy. I can go in soooo many different ways here?..hmmm?......Okay.

Well this actress, (the one that wants to help “the people”), would only tell the host of the show; the whereabouts of said key. She (the actress) could not tell the rest of us pathetic losers; till she had launched her "weight loss" program?! ......I mean her “key”.

Here comes the funny part. I saw the host of this show about a month ago and thin would NOT be a word; I would use to describe this person. AT ALL!

Hmmmmm?.......Could it be possible that the actress gave the host; a key to the mint instead? Maybe she got her metaphors crossed?.........Possible?………..

Anyway. The actress had apparently lost 20 some pounds already in but a few weeks. Yes "weight loss" was detected, (by her I guess), while in her “key” program; which she will not divulge to anyone. Let’s us also remember that she indeed wants to help people.

What do I think? Too easy!...........

When I hear someone say that they have found the key to weight loss, I wanna scream: LOOSE IT!!.........There is no key to weight loss, (trust me), if there were; the weight loss industry would die out!...

I think weight loss like anything else starts in your head.

Interestingly enough the wisest comment on this “show” came from the world's heaviest man who said: “I don’t believe in stomach surgery. I believe the problem (weight gain), is in our head”. He continues. “So until they can come up with surgery for ones head; I will diet one day at time”.......

VERY WISE words indeed....Too bad they got lost in the “bleeps” that we know all too well as television...

I wondered if the actress had received this man's message? Doubtful as the host of the show was twirling her/his hair as she/he listened to the only wise message....

And so it goes. People speak, we listen, they pretend to listen, we talk back, they don't hear, they don’t think. We change our lives, we think, we try to analyze. We dream we hope and some of us; go as far us basing it all on bleeps…..

My quote: “Language is a tangible yet ambiguous friend; she may not relay what you intended to say”....Who knew?.......If you must use this quote you will need to use my name/send me cash. My people will talk to your people....Okay?

So my blog will be a little of this, a little of that and some of the other. As I am a bi cultural bilingual (raised on two sides of the Americas); I will undoubtedly weave those experiences into my writing. In the end we are all filled with experiences and yet lead our lives in wonder.....

I hope you will find my blog thought provoking. I hope that you become a part of the conversation. I hope to make some friends along the way. I hope that others share their experiences with me; but most of all I hope you have fun, a few laughs and enjoy what you see/read along the way.